How many times have you found yourself in a situation that either wasn’t good for you, made you sad, left you feeling lonely or lost, or just outright sucked! I think many of you can relate to this. My question is, what did it take to turn the situation around? What led you on the path that you are on now? Some of you may say you were forced or that you had no choice, or for some, you chose to change your mindset. For the purpose of this article, let’s say you chose the later.
There are many benefits in life to thinking positive. No matter what your situation is. If you were just informed of bad news, if your in a stressful job, caught up in family drama or in a failing or difficult intimate relationship. Whatever the case may be for you, do you believe if changing your perspective or choosing to think more positive thoughts could help you? There are many books and people out there who say it can.
For example, if you are in a troubled relationship, Sanaa Hyder, M.S.Ed. writes on the John Gottman Institute Blog,
“thinking positive thoughts isn’t enough to get you or your relationship out of trouble. Indeed, it’s not enough, but it is essential. Whether your relationship is in the positive or negative determines a lot of things. It determines how conflict discussions will go. It determines how successful repair attempts will be. It even serves as the basis for romance, passion, and good sex. It does not mean that you won’t have trouble. It simply sets the tone for how you will manage that trouble together.” . . . “The theory is that small, intentional, consistent efforts over time will profoundly transform the trajectory of your relationships.”
To apply this example to other situations, you can alter it by, let’s say you and a family member are not getting along. By taking the first step and opening up a dialogue with them may not get the result you are hoping for. Especially if you have already done this before. What is essential is for you to take an inventory of all the things that you like about the person and what they mean to you. If you make a consistent effort by choosing to focus on the positive things about that person, then maybe, just maybe, the dynamic will change. Maybe the trajectory of your conversation will go in a more positive direction. Now I’m encouraging you to be naive or ignore how someone’s actions or words towards you have made you feel. I’m simply saying that if you approach a person with a positive mindset and deliberately make the choice to stay that way, then your outcome will be different. If it’s not, then you can walk away knowing that you did your best. If you must walk away, then as long as you stayed positive, then you can feel grounded in your truth that you did your best and hold no hard feelings. You can carry that positive mindset with you.
Being positive is a choice we all must make. It’s a choice you make everyday. It’s not always easy and it will challenge you. I promise you, that it is worth it. I personally still struggle with staying positive but it’s something I stay mindful of each and everyday. Some days are harder than others, but I am a work in progress just like everyone else!